


Who let the drug abusing lesbians in here?

by Spycegirls



Category: Release The Spyce (Anime)
Genre: F/F, Out of Character, Useless Lesbians, chat fic, shitpost, this is why i'm not allowed nice things
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-09
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-11-14 09:58:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18050366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spycegirls/pseuds/Spycegirls
Summary: I'm gonna make this fandom live even if I have to post shitty fanfics of it





	1. Mei, why

_**Yachiyo Mei has added Sagami Fuu, Hanzoumon Yuki, Aoba Hatsume and six others to the chat** _

 

Yachiyo Mei: that's a bit boring, don't you think?

 

**_Yachiyo Mei has changed the group name to 'Drug abusing lesbians'_ **

 

Yachiyo Mei:  **Perfect**

 

Hanzoumon Yuki:  Mei, we know you're gay, but please don't assume everyone else is also gay.

 

Yachiyo Mei: ???? Do??? You???? Live???? Under???? A????? Rock????? 

 

Hanzoumon Yuki: No, I live in a dojo.

 

Yachiyo Mei: Mentor and Kat-san are together, Goecchi & Hatsu-san don't even try and hide it, Tere-chan is gay and doesn't want to admit it, Byakko, I have no idea, me and Fuu have been together since she was in her last year of middle school, and you...You're just a straight up useless lesbian for Momochi...and speaking of...these names are boring.

 

_**Yachiyo Mei has changed Hanzoumon Yuki's name to 'blue gay'** _

 

_**Yachiyo Mei has changed Minamoto Momo's name to 'pink gay'** _

 

_**Yachiyo Mei has changed  Aoba Hatume's name to 'yellow gay'** _

 

_**Yachiyo Mei has changed Ishikawa Goe's name to 'dark blue gay'** _

 

_**Yachiyo Mei has changed Yachiyo Mei's name to 'orange gay'** _

 

_**Yachiyo Mei has changed Kosaka Shin's name to 'white gay'** _

 

_**Yachiyo Mei has changed Theresia Ray's name to 'floof gay'** _

 

**_Yachiyo Mei has changed Katrina Tobey's name to 'Gay for mentor'_ **

 

**_Yachiyo Mei has changed Sagami Fuu's name to 'I love Yachiyo Mei'_ **

 

I love Yachiyo Mei: MENTOR 

 

Floof gay: I can feel the regret of joining Tsukikage now. Is it too late to leave.

 

Orange gay:  **Yes**

 

Byakko:  **Yes**

 

Blue gay: I agree with Theresia.

 

Dark blue gay: ...Can we not spam the chat with messages, please? Mentor was trying to nap...

 

Orange gay: Eh?

 

Orange gay: oh

 

Orange gay: oH

 

Orange gay: OH

 

Orange gay:  _Nap_ what were you two doing before Hatsu-san wanted to nap ( ͡ᵔ ͜ʖ ͡ᵔ )

 

Dark blue gay: ??? Study?

 

Orange gay: Was it  _biology_ by any chance? ( ͡ᵔ ͜ʖ ͡ᵔ )

 

Dark blue gay: No, it was Chemistry.

 

 Orange gay: was it the chemistry between your love

 

Yellow gay: Nope! Goe-chan was struggling a bit with the equations so I offered to help her.

 

Byakko: Hatsumeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee….when are you getting home...Tere-kou is being boring and doing her work

 

Floof gay: You don't have school like some of us. Now will you please stop moaning. I can hear you from the other side of the door.

 

Floof gay: ….Why is my name 'Floof gay'? I'm not gay and I don't get the floof part.

 

Orange gay: 1) you're totally gay smh 2) the floof part comes from how floofy your hair is

 

Floof gay: …….fluffy*  


**_F_ ** _**_l_ oof gay has changed Floof gay's name to Theresia** _

 

**_Blue gay has changed blue gay's name to Yuki_ **

 

**_Yuki has changed Drug abusing lesbians to Tsukikage_ **

 

Orange gay: my dreams have been crushed :( fuu won't even talk to me for changing her name!  
  
  
I love Yachiyo Mei: BECAUSE I DON'T LOVE YOU, DUMMY

 

Theresia: I hate this

 

Yuki: I'm obliged to agree with you.

 

Orange gay: aNYWAY

 

Orange gay: what are you two doing now ( ͡ᵔ ͜ʖ ͡ᵔ )

 

Yellow gay: Sitting on Goe's bed, in one of her hoodies, watching a movie because your spamming woke me up

 

Orange gay: hmph. my girlfriend is ignoring me, momochi is nowhere to be seen, goecchi and hatsu are on a date...tere-chan is being boring and doing work, byakko is stuck with her, yuki is being a grandma....

 

Orange gay: …….wait

 

Orange gay: wAIT

 

Orange gay: wHERE ARE KAT-SAN AND MENTOR

 

_**Orange gay has pinged  gay for mentor and white gay** _

 

Orange gay: wHERE ARE YOU TWO

 

Orange gay: MENTOR

 

Orange gay: MENTOR

 

Orange gay: MENTOR

 

Orange gay: MENTOR

 

Orange gay: MENTOOOOOOOOOOR

 

White gay: ….Yes, Mei-chan?

 

Orange gay: wHERE ARE YOU

 

White gay: With Katrina...?

 

Orange gay: no shit, I mean _where_

 

White gay: At her apartment...? 

 

Orange gay: i'm coming over

 

White gay: Wh- Mei, no!

 

White gay: Mei!

 

Gay for mentor: I doubt she means it. Now come on Shin-sama, you promised you'd show me how much of a better cook you are!

 

Yuki: This won't end well, will it

 

Theresia: Probably not

 **** **** **** ****


	2. Hell breaks loose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mei shouldn't be allowed anywhere but her own apartment

Orange gay: oH

 

Orange gay: mY

 

Orange gay: gOd

 

Yuki: You didn't actually go there, did you?

  
  
White gay: She did

 

Theresia:  What happened

 

Orange gay: nothing. they were just sat there, eating take-out pizza bc mentor can't cook

 

Theresia: Why'd you say 'oH mY gOd' like that then?

 

Orange gay: 

 

Orange gay: i dropped my snacks on the floor :(

 

Byakko: Did you still eat it.

 

Orange gay: you bet your ass I did

 

Theresia: Wtf

 

Theresia: That's gross, why would you do that

 

Byakko: Ever heard of the five second rule, bitch?

 

Orange gay: :o WHO TAUGHT THE CHILD HOW TO SWEAR

 

Byakko: I'm not a fucking child

 

Orange gay: UR LIKE A FETUS

 

Byakko: I'M 13. THAT'S NOT A FETUS

 

Orange gay: lmao

 

Orange gay: yes it is

 

_**Orange gay has changed Byakko's name to fetus** _

 

Orange gay:  **wait**

 

_**Orange gay has changed orange gay's name to deletus** _

 

Deletus: i'm a fucking genius

 

Deletus: where's my award 

 

White gay: What reward

 

Deletus: my award for being the best apprentice

 

White gay: I gave it to an even better apprentice

 

Deletus: ????? what other apprentice? you only had me

 

White gay: I gave it to Fuu

 

Deletus: :o

 

Deletus: betrayal 

 

Deletus: Where are my friends. I need emotional support.

 

_**Deletus pinged Dark blue gay and pink gay** _

 

Dark blue gay: Hatsume here. What do you want, Mei-chan?

 

Deletus: 👀

 

Deletus: why are you on Goecchi's phone h u h ? 

 

Dark blue gay: You pinged, she asked me to see who it was

 

Deletus: and why are you with Goecchi again, h u h? 

 

Dark blue gay: ….Am I not allowed to be around my apprentice?  


Deletus: of course you are. btw did you notice the bruise on goe's neck?

 

Fetus: bruise?

 

Yuki: a mosquito must've bit her.

 

Deletus: damn, never knew hatsume was a mosquito 

 

Yuki:

 

Fetus:

 

Theresia:

 

Dark blue gay: What do you mean, Mei-chan?

 

Deletus: you and goecchi have been dating for months

 

Dark blue gay: Have we?

 

Fetus: They have?

 

Deletus: you haven't noticed the looks they give each other?

 

Fetus: no????  


Theresia: They're together?

 

Deletus: jealous? 👀

 

Theresia: No.

 

Theresia: My feelings towards Hatsume and Goe are platonic.

 

Deletus: where's goe rn?  


Dark blue gay: In the shower

 

Deletus: Are you with her?  


Dark blue gay: No, she wouldn't let me

 

Deletus: OHO. HATSU-SAN WANTS TO GET KINKY WITH GOECCHI

 

Dark blue gay: According to you, we already have.

 

Deletus: :o 

 

Deletus: hatsu-san. You love me, right?

 

Dark blue gay: Yes Mei-chan. I love you

 

Deletus: Answer me this; who's the top. you or goecchi?

 

Yuki: You can't ask someone that!

 

White gay: Remember when I thought I raised her well? So do I.

 

Dark blue gay:

 

Dark blue gay: it depends on the mood 

 

Deletus: wHAT

 

Dark blue gay: you asked

 

I love Yachiyo Mei: ...You can't just ask someone that

 

_**I love Yachiyo Mei has changed I love Yachiyo Mei's name to Fuu** _

 

Deletus: not even my wife loves me :(

 

Fuu: You're sleeping in the bath tonight 

 

Deletus: EHHHHHHH?!

 

Yuki: you deserve it

 

Theresia: I hate you all. 

 

 


End file.
